I wrote this post a couple days ago. Couldn't decide if I should post it or not. But now I am.
I've had it.
I tried so hard to get his parents to like me.
Why do they still read my blog? Man, I thought they stopped.
The reason is so they can find reasons to hate me.
Look, it's clear. It's out and it's known. You don't need to lie about it anymore.
You tell Ryan all the time that you don't like me and that you want us to break up.
THAT SUCKS.
Because we aren't going to. We are in love. WHY CAN'T YOU BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT?
What kind of parents try to control EVERYTHING that happens in their son's life?
He's 18 for Christ sake.
LET HIM LIVE.
He didn't do anything wrong. He fell in love with someone. Why is that so terrible?
And, better question: Why do you hate me so much?
1. I party.
SO WHAT. Everybody in the world parties! And you realize Ryan is going to COLLEGE, right? Like there are no such thing as college parties? Please.
2. I smoke.
SO DOES HALF THE REST OF THE WORLD.
3. I hurt Ryan.
Guess what!! EVERY. RELATIONSHIP. IS GOING. TO HURT. Relationships are not easy. He's hurt me and I've hurt him. It's how it is. Deal with it. We fight for our love.
Look, it's going to be a painful journey. Couples fight. It happens!! But you act like we're the only couple who fights? Didn't you when you were younger? If you say no, that's complete and utter bullshit, and you know it.
Then what happens?
After so much attempt at getting along with you guys, you come to Ryan's with, what was it? My old blog post?
No. Because you twisted my words around. So what the fuck was it? BULLSHIT. That's what.
It's shit you came up with so you could hurt us. Break us up if you could. Well guess again. Because you can't.
Sorry for being so rude, but I can't be nice! You won't accept me either way, so I might as well tell you how I feel and tell you how FUCKED it is that you would try to ruin a relationship.
I don't care if you're unhappy! Fucking A!! If you have a shitty ass life, that sucks and I truly feel for you. UNTIL you pull shit to make us unhappy too, because now, you're not a good person that bad things have happened to. Now, you're a bad person. Period.
You say I don't really love Ryan and that he doesn't really love me?
PLEASE. Do you even know what love IS anymore?
I think you need to go on a vacation and remember what it's like to fall in love. Then, who knows? Maybe you'll understand and see what you've done wrong in how you've been treating Ryan and I.
Maybe THEN, you'll respect your son's choices and opinions.
Maybe THEN, you'll learn to REALLY care about him and how he feels.
Maybe THEN, you'll get over yourselves and actually GET TO KNOW ME.
But until THEN comes... Ryan and I are gonna fight you. We are gonna fight for what WE KNOW is right and what WE KNOW we want.
Yeah, we're so controlling that we encouraged
ReplyDeletehim to move out and live on his own before
college. Maybe you're upset because you
can't control his every move.
The only reason we read your blog is to
monitor your mental health which concerns us
when you say things like "somebody kill me".
Not something we think Ryan should be around.
So half the world parties and smokes.
Well...usually not at 16 years old. We
encourage Ryan to be part of the successful
half that doesn't party and smoke.
Also every relationship DOESN'T Hurt. Maybe
just everyone you are in. As far as love
goes, we've been married 21 years so I think
we know a little about love. But we have
never cheated on each other, so maybe you
have something to learn.
We never had a problem with Ryan's last
girlfriend and in fact we still visit her at
her work often. (Work- employment, a job,
look it up, maybe you could get one)
Ryan will do what he wants and we accept that
but we will always encourage him to make
healthy choices. And we will love him just
like we have for the last 18 years.
Yeah, you originally wanted me to move out so that you wouldnt have to kick me out, remember? And I don't recall any conversation on lindsey controlling me?
DeleteSure, the only reason you read her blog is to "monitor" her mental health. And that is why you use shit from it in EVERY argument we have on this topic.
So... You're saying that Dad isn't successful? Im not planning on partying my WHOLE life. Im just finding out what I think is fun.
And are you telling me that YOUR relationship hasn't hurt? I have several cherished childhood memories of my Mom and Dad yelling across the house about getting a divorce. Yeah, don't tell me that didn't hurt. And I don't think that you know that much about love, since most of your interactions are you bitching at Dad to do things. I see maybe 4 or 5 moments of actual love every month, and most of those are forced.
And the only reason you ever see Angela is because she works at the Deli that you like to go to, you have no connection to her. And guess what? Not everybody needs to get a job. And the only choices you encourage are the ones you decide on. So don't rationalize every single decision you make for me as being "healthy", they are just what you want. And as for the love, I don't know. There have been good times and bad times, so I expect the future to be exactly the same.
Oh, and just letting you know, if you read something on this blog, keep it to yourself. I don't want to hear about it in conversation.
Excuse me, but he is HELPING ME. He's helping me get through things!! HOW IS THAT BAD? If I wasn't with him, I'd be dead already! Do you understand that? Your son saved me! Shouldn't you be happy and be proud of him for that instead of influencing him to break up with me??
ReplyDeleteAlso, YEAH THEY DO.
Most of the people who partied started at 16. Hell, some people YOUNGER.
Also, I like how you're assuming that everyone who parties/smokes WON'T be successful. I KNOW PLENTY OF PEOPLE who do and are VERY successful. Like my brother!!
And PLEASE. You're kidding yourself if you think that relationships can be 100% PERFECT. People fight!! IT'S NORMAL. Hell, it's healthy to fight and argue! That's how you LEARN. Ryan and I have an AWESOME relationship, even when we DO fight. ASK HIM. Oh wait, you don't listen to him. I forgot. You just want what YOU want for him. You don't care what he wants. OBVIOUSLY, since you're trying to break us up.
And it sure as hell doesn't seem like you guys love each other! Ryan DOES talk to me, you know.
You two have fought too, from what I've heard. So don't be hypocritical.
If you guys are doing well, then fighting won't ALWAYS lead to failure. Ryan and I are in LOVE and I don't understand why you can't accept that and/or be happy about it.
Why are you trying to break us up?!
I honestly do NOT care if YOU love Angela so god damn much that you visit her.
Good for you. I'm glad you like her.
Ryan however, doesn't and he isn't visiting her, which is why what YOU do does not matter to me as long as it doesn't effect him or myself.
You say you accept what he wants but want him to make healthy choices?
So you're saying that I'm not?
Thanks.
Whatever. You can hate me all you want. But we all know I didn't do anything to you to make you dislike me.
Hopefully one day you will actually realize that you're being unreasonable and will see clearly. Maybe one day you'll get over it and will love me for who I am.
Because either way, Ryan and I are going to be together.
Maybe someday when you're more mature you'll understand wanting good things for your children. I will never like the things you do, so don't bother rationalizing your choices. I also have never said you won't be together with Ryan, I have only hoped you could grow up a little and act more mature, in ways, like getting a job and good grades and dealing with your mental health issues. Those things would not only help you, but would help your relationship. (the same things I mentioned back in May) If that isn't caring about someone, then what is? Oh, I know you don't have to have a job or good grades or medication to do well, BUT IT REALLY HELPS!!!!!
DeleteI don't give two shits if you like what I DO.
ReplyDeleteWhat I DO, isn't who I AM.
And you say I need to grow up and mature. PLEASE.
I know more about the world than most people do.
I am WAY smarter than most 16 year olds and you can ask anyone who knows me. They'll say the same fucking thing.
You probably think I'm immature because I party and because I cuss?
Yeah, well get over it because that's who I am.
I am DONE trying to get you guys to like me because I know it'll never happen. You're just gonna bitch and complain about everything I do.
Also, I think it's funny that you didn't respond to what RYAN said. Your son.
Yeah, believe it or not, he's not a huge fan of you either.
You treat his girlfriend like trash. LIKE HE'S REALLY GOING TO APPRECIATE THAT.
I don't care what YOU think because YOUR thinking is irrational and is blinded by HATE.
You miss Angela. So you're holding that against me. IS THAT IT?
Well fuck. That just sucks, now doesn't it?
Also, I loveee how you USE to like me and then the next day despised me.
Same with Ryan's dad, except when it's just me and his dad talking, like it was a few times, he actually GOT ALONG with me. He treated me like I actually am a person with feelings. UNLIKE YOU. Who acts like I'm just some fucking robot with no emotions.
Funny thing is, his dad would probably like me a hell of a lot more than he does now if YOU weren't poisoning his thought process by what you think and want.
You can hate me all you fucking want.
I'm a good person.
Just because I make bad choices every now and then and do stupid things, does NOT make me a bad person.
I'm 16 FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. LET ME MAKE MISTAKES. THIS IS WHEN TEENAGERS ARE SUPPOSE TO MAKE MISTAKES AND LEARN. You have no idea what I've been through, what I continue to go through, and how I feel or what is preventing me from certain things like getting a job or taking care of my mental health and whatnot.
ALSO.
Next year, things are going to change! My life WILL turn around. I WILL get a job and get good grades! I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE BECAUSE BELIEVE IT OR NOT, MY PARENTS ARE ASSHOLES.
They threaten me with more than you can imagine.
I go through way more than you can even come close to understanding.
Don't you dare call me immature.
I've gone through enough that would kill you or any other normal human being. If you can call what you say and do "normal".
Yeah, I'm done being nice. Obviously.
But really, what difference does it make? Because you're going to despise me no matter WHAT I say/do. Isn't that right?
You can't interfere in what's going on in my life or what's going in Ryan's and my relationship.
Just TRY. For the LOVE OF GOD, just TRY to find it in your godforsaken heart to RESPECT that we are together.